Hello! It's been a while and that is most definitely an understatement.
In my last blog post in 2020, I was living with my in-laws and looking for a job.
I now have a job and I'm living with... my mum! 😂 I am still a strange kind of adult but I am the happiest I have ever been so I don't really mind.
I have moved back to my home county of Derbyshire. After eight years of living in cities, the pandemic and lockdown made me realise I wasn't living in them because I wanted to, I was living in them because I thought I 'should'. I was thinking and worrying about what others would think if I moved back home. And that was really silly because in every city I moved to I was always looking for that little bit of Derbyshire.
Of course, I never found it and so in 2021, I moved back home.
It is so wonderful to walk for only five minutes and be surrounded by beauty or to see a sheep. I only actually have to look out of my window and I see beauty.
I am so grateful now that this is my home and that I have got to come back here.
In 2021, I also found my spirituality. I have always dipped my toe into the wonder-full witchy world. I loved Sabrina and Buffy and finding teen witch books in WH Smith when I was younger. It has always been there but in 2021, I really embraced it.
I began moon journaling with each phase of the moon. I found beautiful, spiritual people to learn from and guide me.
One of the greatest being Tara Alexandra.
Tara completely changed my life. She helped me heal from things I never thought it would be possible to heal from and she helped me find my self-worth and self-confidence. I am so grateful every day to have found her and I am even more grateful to now call her a friend.
In 2021, I also step out of the scaredy-cat creative closet and actually began selling my work.
It all started with my book "I want to be here".
I began creating it in March 2021, after having quite a rough time of it with my mental health. I had found myself at a crossroads and instead of doing what I usually do, which is to keep going and going until I end up completely self destruct, I asked for help.
I talked with a GP, I spoke to my boss and there were points where I thought I had fucked up and then the idea for "I want to be here" came along. And it came along fully formed. There is a part of me that feels like I had no choice but to create this book.
Now the book itself is made up of my poetry, photography and art. And it documents my journey with my mental health from the darkness through to the light, which I was already beginning to find simply by being open and honest.
I put it all together myself, teaching myself InDesign and I am very proud of it.
Along with selling copies of "I want to be here", in January 2022 I began selling my paintings.
Even though I had already been selling my book for 6 months, this was still a big deal for me.
There was a lot of fear about whether anyone would actually like what I create.
The paintings I enjoy creating are all abstract and usually extremely colourful. This is obviously not going to be to everyone's taste but I am very happy to report that I have sold paintings throughout 2022.
I am so grateful to every person who has bought one of my paintings. It truly means so much.
I think that are all the biggest things/changes to report!
I am committed to reinvigorating this blog so there will be more to come. I am aiming to do two blog posts a month and I will be sharing some of my writing, both non-fiction and fiction,
I am excited to get back to it. And I hope you are too.
Thank you so much for reading.